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April 19, 2019

I am Mel...









Welcome to..........
..............my......
studio...and.........
............design....
galaxy...............


......spored.....
.............from
Minnea-   ...........polis..

...body is...in
New York.....








today I have
updated my website.
what is this website for?



why do people
have websites?








.........they have a portfolio....
they want a job.......................
.........they have a brand.........
the person is the brand........
.........the person wants..........
to be seen as...........................
.........................something......
......they want to be seen......



i went to art school...
...i know.............
......i was excited to
play with space.......
..........and form...


to learn..........new ......techniques with materials.....
....simply playing...


...naive....but now
i understand........
......these modes of
... looking.......


...online....feeds...
ads....stores.........
..........galleries...
.....where .....
..is the humanity...





it is a fine line between.......

sharing an
image........................................
.....................and advertising
                  
exhibiting art
and ideas.................................
.....................and exhibiting 
                     the ‘image’ of 
                     art and ideas......

sharing something
with an audience...................
.....................and alienating
               an audience........






when are you really saying the things you want to say?
when do you engage with a subject vs. when do you show a subject? when are you over-reliant on proximity to names, institutions, power? when are you making your resume your identity?  when are you being elitist? when are you being too academic? when are you too entrenched in coded images? when are you too entrenched in being fashionable? when does it look too commercial? when are you editing too much? when are you being ‘you’ vs. being the ‘image of you’? 















  being
  armored...



(........superficial..........the ‘impenetrable’ brand.......
.....the ‘image’ of the way things are............torture of possibility.......
...........torture of idealism)


identity...affected by
....forms...of........
.........consumption

how do modes of................ production, display.....and ......staging.........in art and design and......advertising
............provide a setting....
to detour through........the Other......to define one’s.... ..................................self.......



...in other words...
looking..............
.....while being.....
looked back at......









some people treat...
...and view.........
..........others and
themselves...........
......like a piece of
...furniture.........
.........packaged...
                                                                                              

don’t sit on me!

i wonder what
people are thinking
when they save my
website images for
their moodboards...

...
are you corporate?











...identity..............starts from
scratch  ........
.........models.....armatures..........cutout ..
...forms....



........sometimes layered.......
...accumulative.......................
......sometimes regressive...
always roundabout...............




...diasporic.........
populations...think
...........about.....
assimilation.........
....cultural..........
........mutations...
 placelessness....










on a surface level....
........yes i do want
to be seen......but...
......through my....
vulnerabilities...
........................
and no......i am not
talking about..........
............portraying vulnerability...........
or.....aestheticizing...
vulnerability...........
.......i am talking....
about simply.....being vulnerable.............

...throwing something......
in the air.................and not sure..........where anything
......will land..........................


not being consolidated........
.......not always....uniform.....
..............nothing perfect........
...uncertain.............confused
.................frustrated...............



everything can lead
....anywhere.......
........paths are.... ultimately..........
.......not linear....
...i’m vulnerable...
..........but........
passionate.....
............i’m very
......passionate....
...excited.......the
things i do and.....
think...are erratic
......explosive
and many times...
.....inconsistent...

i feel a compulsion
......to share these
wild energies...









    being              exposed...




i keep some things......close
.....to me...........and personal ...........and private...................
...but i also want to share....
some things......because....... ......ultimately...............i exist
.................in a world with......
people and....being alive...... ...means.........being in............ .....................interaction with
.........other............people........
......sharing........energies.......

                    






.......i have all these energies....while not knowing what.......
.........my role is...

this website is......... 
not a portfolio.......
i did not package all
the images to be seen quickly...............

please...........
slow down....
........or come back later......


perhaps a remedy to.....
..................the artist’s or designer’s website........
i am unsure......................


.......and with.......no clear......
association with.....................
........institutions or names...
...................avoiding clout......
.....avoiding hype....................









..............i am not necessarily presenting...............................
.........................the best me....
.............it is simply me...........
......simply Mel...................
                     






this website is an archive ..
............of........ experiments...
..............and...
moments.....of
vulnerability...